2. Hysteria
Do you remember the Doctor? Ten-part drama starring Charlie Craggs, with Jodie Whittaker.
Following an ominous message from Rani Chandra, Cleo drags her brother Jordan to the creepiest hotel in London to find out what the hell sheās talking about. Meanwhile, Abby meets Dr Oliver Morgenstern to ask him about what happened at Royal Hope Hospital in 2008.
Click through to our programme page for episode transcripts.
Credits:
Cleo Proctor - Charlie Craggs
Abby McPhail - Lois Chimimba
Shawna Thompson - Holly Quin-Ankrah
Rani Chandra - Anjli Mohindra
Jordan Proctor - Jacob Hawley
Dr Oliver Morgenstern - Kieran Hodgson
The Receptionist - Natasha Hodgson
The Ravulox - Juno Dawson
Additional Voices - Ken Cheng and Siena Kelly
Written by Juno Dawson
Produced by Ella Watts
Directed by Ella Watts and James Robinson
Executive Producer: James Robinson
Sound Engineer: Paul Clark
Studio Assistant: Jacob Tombling
Sound Design: David Thomas
Additional Sound Design: Arlie Adlington
Original Composition: David Devereux
Production Co-ordinators: Sarah Sharpe and Sarah Nicholls
Recorded at Sonica Studios, Clapham.
A BBC Studios Production for BBC Sounds.
#DoctorWhoRedacted
2. HYSTERIA
DOCTOR WHO: REDACTED
PART 2
Written by
Juno Dawson
1. ZOOM CALL ā DAY
The Velcro-glitch and humming synth of the BBC Sounds ident.
BBC SOUNDS IDENT
BBC Sounds: Music, Radio, Podcasts
A slow ticking-clock type music track comes in, with various glitching glass-like synths.
CREDITS
Doctor Who Redacted: Episode Two. By Juno Dawson.
The ticking clock music goes on, with soft percussion and synths under Abbyās opening speech.
ABBY
The saying goes, ātrust me, Iām a doctor,ā but history shows time and again that not all doctors are here to cure us. From Dr Crippen to Dr Jekyll, there are some doctors who really need to work on their bedside manner...
The ticking clock music comes to a decisive stop. From now on, Abby and Shawnaās audio is slightly muffled and distorted, clearly showing theyāre being heard through a laptop speaker.
ABBY (CONTāD)
(Beat)
Is that OK? Itās too cheesy? (SHAWNA softly immediately saying no, reassuring Abby)
CLEO
No, no! Strong pun game, I like it.
Abby, speaking over Zoom, turns off the recording.
ABBY
OK, letās talk this through before we record. What have we actually got so far?
CLEO
Oh you know, just a mysterious journalist calling me up out of literally nowhere.
SHAWNA
Oh God yeah
CLEO
First of all: who gave her my number? RUDE. And second of all, who CALLS? Itās 2022, slide into my DMs like a normal person!
(Beat)
Ugh, anyway, she said we have to find someone called āthe Doctorā?
ABBY
Yes, ok
SHAWNA
Sheffield police are looking for some doctor in connection to those two blokes going missing round here.
ABBY
Yep. And, of course, the rumours about the blue box. Some records mention a doctor too.
SHAWNA
What records?
ABBY
Well thatās the thing...all the forums are down, so I canāt check. (SHAWNA makes a surprised and intrigued noise)
CLEO
Girl, you have pages and pages of notes!
ABBY
(Huffing) Yeah, thatās the other thing. (Beat)
All my files are⦠corrupted. I-I donāt know what happened.
FX - police sirens, getting louder.
SHAWNA
I can probably recover them, but Iād need your laptop. You want me to come up to Glasgow? A little visit?
ABBY
Oh! Yeah! Maybe, thatād be nice. Who has got the police cars?
SHAWNA
Sorry thatās me. Let me go look... (Beat, SHAWNA walks to the window, her voice getting distant and muffled as we hear it bouncing off glass)
Thereās a load of coppers over at the next block, talking to Mr Khan.
ABBY
Who?
SHAWNA
The Khans! Najia and Hakim. Theyāre nice. Their daughterās a cop...or she was...thatās weird. I hope theyāre OK...
CLEO
Guys! Sorry to be all about me for a minute but am I about to go meet a serial killer? This Rani woman could literally be anyone.
Thereās a pause.
ABBY
(Sighing, indulgent) What did she actually say, Cleo?
CLEO
Just that it was like āvital we metā and she couldnāt say anything over the phone because it wasnāt a āsecure lineā, whatever that means. Then she started going on about how like the Doctor is killing us? I was like girl thatās like, the biggest red flag of all the red flags. Absolutely not.
ABBY
Obviously I canāt check right now but I thought the blue box doctor was a man.
SHAWNA
Sexist.
ABBY
True. But most serial killers are male, Cleo, you are probably safe. You could ask Jordan to go with you?
CLEO
Ugh, no. Iām sulking with him right now⦠I guess it would be safer. Yeah
We hear the sound of someone tapping a keyboard in the background.
SHAWNA
The Doctor. Wonder if heās some sort of modern-day Jack-the-Ripper?
CLEO
Oh thanks a lot, Shawna.
ABBY
(Cutting in) I ā Iām sure youāll be fine. Rani Chandra isnāt a doctor. Sheās from London. Or at least she was...she works all over the world now.
Bylines for Time, Vice, New Statesman. She seems legit.
CLEO
Fine, fine, Iāll go. But if I die, Iām coming back to haunt you so bad.
SHAWNA and ABBY laugh warmly.
ABBY
(Very warm) Please do.
(Beat)
Oh! I found us a doctor who might be able to help us, anyway.
SHAWNA
You did? Who?
ABBY
Er- you know what? Let me start recording.
Thereās a beep, followed by the Blue Box Files theme.
Blue Box Files theme plays
SHAWNA
(Singing RnB style)
The Blue Box, The Blue Box
MAN
(Ominous laugh)
ā¦Files
Thereās an electric zap sound, the Wilhelm scream, and an orchestral Dun Dun Dunn.
CLEO, SHAWNA and ABBYās audio now changes into slightly echoe-y but much clearer sound, theyāre obviously on their podcast now.
ABBY (CONT'D)
Hello and welcome to the Blue Box Files, a podcast dedicated to the weird and wonderful sightings of that mysterious blue box throughout history. As ever, youāre listening to Abby MacPhail...
CLEO
Iām Cleo Proctor...
SHAWNA
This is your girl Shawna Thompson. How are we all this week?
CLEO
Yeah! Not bad!
CLEO and ABBY talk over each other, loudly and happily answering Shawna at the same time.
ABBY
Yes! Iām good...as we were discussing off-air, I am very
caught up in podcast drama. We love it when other boxspotters send us messages.
CLEO
We do
ABBY
Please
SHAWNA
Yeah, yeah, but letās keep āem sane guys...
ABBY
But thereās been none at all this week.
CLEO
(Raising her voice) Yeah, come on guys! Like, share, subscribe, tell your Nan, you know
ABBY
Yes! Please! (CLEO hmms approvingly) If youāre a regular listener, do get in touch with us. Whatās going on out there, guys? But anyway, letās crack on...
SHAWNA
What have you got for us, this week, Abz?
ABBY
Oh this week is a goodie. What do we know about mass hysteria?
SHAWNA
Girl, I was a One Direction fan. Harry Styles is an honorary lesbian as far as Iām concerned. You havenāt seen mass hysteria unless you were at Sheffield Arena in 2015.
Laughter.
CLEO
Wait but, wasnāt hysteria like a Victorian thing for women?
ABBY
(Excited) Yes, yes! Well now you mention it, hystera is the Greek word for uterus, hence hysterectomy. And you are quite right, in the 19th century, doctors literally believed lady parts were driving women crazy.
SHAWNA
I hear that.
CLEO
(Loud, amused) Oh keep it PG, Shawna.
SHAWNA
(Faux innocent) What? What?
ABBY
(Grinning) Mass hysteria refers to a shared madness if you like. And this one is mad. In 2008, literally hundreds of witnesses report seeing Londonās Royal Hope hospital vanish.
SHAWNA
(Deeply skeptical) Vanish?
ABBY
(With relish) The whole hospital simply disappeared, leaving a great whopping hole in the ground.
CLEO
Canāt take that David Blaine anywhere. Such a stunt queen. (SHAWNA laughs)
ABBY
Amazingly that was one theory! Hereās the thing - to this day, some people swear they saw bulletins about this on the BBC, although no footage of such an incident exists and the BBC denies all knowledge.
SHAWNA
Well, naturally, who controls the media?
CLEO
We know Shawna, the Illuminati...ok (ABBY laughs)
SHAWNA
I was gonna say the Murdochs, (CLEO laughs) but I can roll with Illuminati.
ABBY
The hospital returned - according to bystanders - after a couple of hours. Witnesses inside the Royal Hope - and this is where it gets even more bizarre - claim the hospital was teleported to the moon. (SHAWNA huffs a disgusted sigh)
CLEO
Sure, Jan.
ABBY
No no no! We are talking dozens of witnesses.
SHAWNA
OK, Iām gonna go with gas leak? Pesticides? Or meds in the water? Like itās a hospital...one time the dentist gave me laughing gas and I thought I was on the moon to be fair.
CLEO
Wait wait wait. Girls, they didnāt actually go to the moon.
ABBY
Well clearly not but...wait for it.
Play Abbyās Blue Box jingle.
ABBY (CONT'D)
A number of witnesses also report seeing...
SHAWNA
(Exasperated) Blue box?
Slow mysterious piano music comes in softly here, building a sense of tension and mystery.
ABBY
Jackpot! This time, specifically, the vintage police call box which is a recurring theme in about 60% of sightings.
SHAWNA
Or 100% of sightings of actual police call boxes all over the UK.
ABBY
Yes, well, regardless, with it being a hospital there were, obviously, a bunch of doctors inside, including a certain doctor...
The music comes up, getting louder with a steady percussion beat like a ticking clock to end the scene.
2. INT. TESCO EXPRESS. DAY 2
FX ā people, machines, tinny pop music through speakers, āunexpected item in the bagging area alertā.
CLEO
(Under her breath)
Yes, I know, Iām trying to steal some onions you little...
Her phone rings.
Hello?
CLEO (CONT'D)
ABBY
Hey itās me!
CLEO
Hey, you OK babe?
ABBY
Yes. Iām editing your interview with Penny Carter. Is there any way you think you could convince her to let us use her name? Having a journalist from The Observer on the podcast would be a big deal.
CLEO
Ugh, Abbyā¦You were the one who reached out to her though.
ABBY
I know, but I thought you met her so she might be more inclined.
CLEO
I dunno, Abs. Youāre the boss. I just make sassy comments.
ABBY
Exactly! Youāre the charm. Please. if anyone can convince her, itās you.
CLEO
OK, Iāll call her now.
ABBY
(Squeaking with excitement) Thank you!
CLEO
Let me just get out of the supermarket. The security guard is staring at me.
ABBY
Legend. Call me right back!
We hear Cleo go to exit the store.
CLEO
(At security guard)
Okā¦See? Receipt! I paid for my onions!
FX - The automatic doors slide open. Street noise. Car horns etc. Cleo dials Penny. We hear a dial tone and then...
PENNY VOICEMAIL
Hi this is Penny Carter at The Observer, please ā (REDACTED DISTORTION ā a singing, hissing, almost living static)
CLEO
Well thatās weird. Maybe I got the wrong...
She tries again. The Redacted sound gets even louder: high pitched tones and panning static that sweeps across our ears, glitching.
CLEO
Oh my God! What the hell is that noise?
The Redaction cuts off abruptly, and the podcast falls silence.
3. INT. CLEO FLAT. LONDON 3
House music playing in the background, drum and bass. Cleo enters the kitchen and flips the kettle on. JORDAN is playing X-Box loudly - Call of Duty.
CLEO
(Annoyed) Can you turn that down please? (Beat)
And can you take your trainers out on the balcony? They stink
JORDAN
Alright alright, chill out.
He pause his game and puts his trainers outside.
JORDAN (CONT'D)
There. You happy?
CLEO
Thank you. Do you want a cup of tea?
JORDAN
Nah Iām OK, got a protein shake.
CLEO
It might be that that stinks of feet to be honest.
(Beat)
So. Did you talk to Mum?
JORDAN
Yeah, I did
Sound of CLEO aggressively stirring her tea with a teaspoon.
CLEO
And?
JORDAN
Andā¦Iām gonna see her Sunday
Thereās a long silence.
JORDAN (CONT'D)
What? You telling me you aināt got an opinion on that?
CLEO
(Huffing) The police never even questioned her!
JORDAN
Come on Cleo, donāt with all that again. Mum didnāt kill Dad.
CLEO
Jordan - how is it a 39 year old man can just vanish off the face of the earth? Our dad aināt no Lord Lucan is he? He couldnāt work the tumble dryer!
JORDAN
He was just obviously having an affair or something.
Cleo starts to interrupt, saying āNo, noā
JORDAN (CONT'D)
You called me a Mummyās Boy but as if youāre not the ultimate daddyās girl (CLEO gasps, offended)- before you even was a girl, you was his favourite.
Cleo doesnāt deny that.
JORDAN (CONT'D)
Heās just off with some bird in Marbella or somewhere innit? Youāve been doing your podcast too long, youāve started believing all them mad conspiracy theories.
CLEO
OK. Whatever, fair. Mum and Dad both had their favourites.
JORDAN
(Sarcastic) You think?
CLEO
But there is no way, no way on earth, that Dad would have left me alone with that woman Jordan. Not with everything I was going through.
Thereās a long pause.
JORDAN
(Sighing, solemn) Yeah well, we aināt ever gonna know are we. Heās not cominā back. Not after all these years.
(Beat)
Jeez well this is a buzzkill, I was just trying to play Call of Duty! (CLEO heaves a big sigh, JORDAN speaks gently). What, do you want a pizza or something? Something to cheer us up?
CLEO
Tempting, butā¦no, tonight Iām gonna stay home and epilate my sensual gorilla legs. I got a hot date tomorrow.
JOE
What? Who are you dating with your gorilla legs? Donāt tell me itās another poshboi banker from Surrey again.
CLEO
Youāre one to talk! Your last two girlfriends literally went to the same guy for fillers and botox.
(Beat)
And Iāll have you know sheās a beautiful journalist.
JORDAN
She?!
CLEO
Yes!
JORDAN
Does that make you a lesbian now? How does that work? I donāt think trans people can be lesbians Cleo (CLEO starts laughing)
CLEO
Yes they can!
(Beat)
But Iām winding you up. Itās for the podcast you muppet. Strictly profesh.
JORDAN
She another conspiracy nutter?
CLEO
More than likely.
JORDAN
Just text me where youāre going yeah? If she gives off dodgy vibes, Iāll rescue you.
CLEO
Aw thanks babeā¦But actually - what you got on tomorrow?
JORDAN
Gym. Why?
The scene ends with the chugging, metal rattling sound of a train.
FX - train announcement.
TRAIN
We are now arriving at Edinburgh Waverley, our final destination on this service. All change. All change.
Upbeat pop music comes in, a track with a fast beat in a major key that gives us a sense of movement and gathering speed.
5. EXT. EDINBURGH. DAY 5
The pop music ends sharply with the sound of a door opening.
We hear people in a cafe. Abby approaches a table.
ABBY
Hello? Doctor? (Big pause)
Dr Morgenstern?
Ah, not that Doctor this time.
OLIVER
(Flustered) Abby? Hello there! Please call me Oliver.
ABBY
Oliver, Iām so sorry Iām late...my train was delayed...
OLIVER
Itās OK, youāre here now. (Soft laugh)
ABBY
Let me get my stuff ready.
She sets up her recording equipment.
OLIVER
You want a coffee or something?
ABBY
Aye, an oat latte would be great. (Beat)
And youāre still happy for me to record all this?
OLIVER
Absolutely. I want to set the record straight.
ABBY
Brilliant.
(Beat)
All sound in the cafĆ© cuts off for a moment, including the people and machines. Then thereās a beep.
ABBY (CONTāD)
Welcome back to the Blue Box Files. Today Iām joined by Dr Oliver Morgenstern. Thank you so much for doing this, doctor...Oliver. (OLIVER laughs bashfully) Shall we start at the beginning?
OLIVER
(Self conscious) The whole thing was insane. I donāt know where to...
ABBY
You were a doctor?
OLIVER
Uh, yeah, I am. Still practicing, although Iām a psychiatrist now.
ABBY
I read your novel last night.
OLIVER
(Embarrassed) You did?
ABBY
Aye. You talk about how giant rhino aliens transported the Royal Hope to the moon..? Again, sorry.
OLIVER
Uh, no! Thatās quite all right. I did indeed write that book, although I think Iāve since reevaluated my stance.
ABBY
How so?
OLIVER
I donāt believe in regrets, but I wish Iād taken more time to...process before I self- published my novel. I see things differently now.
ABBY
In what way?
OLIVER
Well for one thing, people made fun of me online.
ABBY
Try being a woman online.
OLIVER
I dread to think. I suppose...I donāt doubt that something took place on that date in the hospital. (ABBY starts to uh-huh enthusiastically)It was traumatic. The trauma was real. But what I think happened now was more akin to some form of mass hallucination or mass hysteria.
ABBY
(Tutting) Internal vapours.
OLIVER
What?
ABBY
Hysteria. Thatās what Victorians thought it was.
OLIVER
(Polite laughter)
I see. Iāve researched it extensively for a new book Iām working on. Itās a real phenomenon.
ABBY
But how could so many people believe they were on the moon?
OLIVER
Oh an idea can spread like a virus. Truly. In North Carolina in 2002, this group of cheerleaders all suffered identical seizures with no obvious physiological cause.
ABBY
Seriously?
OLIVER
In Portugal in 2006, girls started experiencing symptoms of a fictional virus theyād seen in a teen soap. There are hundreds of other cases all throughout history.
Slowly soft, ominous music comes in very quietly. Itās a low drone, with high scraping synths glittering over the top of a low fuzzy pulse like broken glass.
ABBY
Still, please...for so many people to see the surface of the moon? You saw it!
OLIVER
Ahā¦but did I? I donāt know what I saw. Itās hazy now. It was a long time ago. I remember the panic, the fear. I remember people saying we were on the moon. But⦠I just donāt remember being on the moon.
Thereās a pause.
ABBY
So what do you think happened?
OLIVER
I donāt know. But I think, perhaps, itās better if I move on from that chapter in my life. (ABBY sighs, fiercely disappointed as OLIVER goes on) Iām safe, Iām well, and digging for answers has only brought misery.
ABBY
You sound like my boyfriend.
OLIVER
(Gently) He might have a point? This - obsession - with the truth took over my life, Abby. I lost my girlfriend over it; friends; my family thought Iād lost it. It wasnāt worth it.
(Beat)
Look at what happened to my friend Martha Jones. She became obsessed with this chap, āthe Doctorā, and vanished off the face of the earth.
ABBY
Sorry, did you say āthe Doctorā?
OLIVER
(Getting worried) Yeah, I ā he was there that day. Canātā¦really remember him. But he was dangerous.
ABBYās breathing quickens and she gets to her feet with a scrape of her chair.
ABBY
Dr...Oliver. I need to go Iām so sorry...
OLIVER
Is everything OK?
ABBY
I think my friend might be in trouble...
The ominous music continues ā an alien humming buzz at a low tone with scraping synths glittering over the top.
EXT. LONDON. DAY 6
The music is cut off by the sound of a passing car. Weāre outside on the street.
General city noise. CLEO meets JORDAN.
JORDAN
(Calls) Cleo!
Cleo runs over.
CLEO
Hey babe! Thanks for doing this.
JORDAN
No worries.
(Beat)
I just got off the phone with Mum...
CLEO
Oh God, donāt start, Iāve not had any breakfast and Iām hangry.
Cleoās phone rings.
CLEO (CONT'D)
Not now, Abby. God, sheās stressing me out too.
JORDAN
Mum really wants to see you. She canāt put it right if you donāt give her a chance.
CLEO
Look Jordan, if this is gonna be some big intervention or something, I can go meet Rani by myself. Itās not big deal.
JORDAN
What to a creepy hotel on your own to meet some strange woman? I donāt think so. Iām your brother innit, so shut up.
CLEO
Ok, ok.
(Beat) Thanks.
(beat)
Wait how you know itās creepy?
JORDAN
Well, cos...weāre here.
They both look up at the hotel.
CLEO
Oh God that is creepy.
6. PHONECALL. 7
FX - dial tone.
We stay in Abbyās perspective in this scene, hearing her clearly, whilst Shawnaās voice is slightly muffled and distorted by the phone. Thereās the sound of people in the background.
A slow synth and piano piece of mysterious music plays quietly under this scene, invoking a sense of quiet wonder
SHAWNA
Hey, hey, hey.
ABBY
(Worried)
Shawna, have you heard from Cleo?
SHAWNA
No. Why? Are you OK?
ABBY
Ooooh, I am so very not OK. I just finished with the Oliver guy and I think this Rani woman might be dangerous.
What?
SHAWNA
ABBY
Oliver confirmed it. Thereās a person called āThe Doctorā. And he might be trouble.
SHAWNA
Oh. OK. Look, Iām at college...I could get in the car but itād be hours until I got to London...
ABBY
Should I call the police?
SHAWNA
And tell them what?
ABBY
Damn it! Iām meant to be meeting Craig at the cinema. I canāt just leave Cleo. God, heās gonna be so mad at me.
(Beat)
Shawna? Are you there?
SHAWNA
Iām here. Abz. I donāt know what to say. This is messed up.
ABBY
This podcast is getting a bit real.
SHAWNA
Right? Abz, I donāt wanna be the subject of a Blue Box File...
The music keeps playing softly in the background, soft slow synths and electric keyboard.
8 INT. HOTEL ONYX. DAY 8
We hear the rattle of a door opening, and traffic from inside. The music from the previous scene stops. Inside sounds plush and fairly quiet, with very soft music playing in the room.
CLEO
Okā¦
JORDAN
Whyās there no one here?
FX ā A desk bell. The RECEPTIONIST, who speaks with a slightly reptilian lisp
RECEPTIONIST
Hello thereā¦
CLEO
Helloā¦Ms Receptionist, weāre here to see Rani Chandra?
RECEPTIONIST
Ah yes. Youāre in Suite 13. Fourth floor.
CLEO
Wait, she wants me to go to her room?
RECEPTIONIST
Iām a receptionist at a hotel where we charge by the hour, my policy is not to ask.
FX ā They head for the stairs.
JORDAN
You know when I used to work on that building site on Tottenham Court Road? I used to walk past here all the time. I never saw a hotel here.
9 INT. HOTEL ONYX. DAY 9
We hear another heavier door opening, JORDAN and CLEOās voices echo against a concrete staircase, with JORDAN at the top and CLEO further away, out of breath.
JORDAN
Hurry UP Cleo, just pretend thereās a frappucino at the top of the stairs or something.
Out of breath, CLEO and JORDAN arrive at the Room 13.
CLEO
(Huffing, out of breath) My god. Is your gym trans friendly? Iām so unfit. (She stops to catch her breath) Oh finally.
JORDAN
Itās this one. Room 13.
CLEO
Wait, look at the key...What the hell? Have you ever seen anything like that?
JORDAN
Come on, just try it in the door...
CLEO
Okā¦But wait wait wait - If she wants to get weird...just run OK?
JORDAN
You told me she was hot! Iām not running anywhere, you can run.
CLEO
Shut up Jordan, this is serious. Look, let me try.
An alien series of beeps and digital sounds chirp from the key.
FX ā the door clicks open.
They enter the suite.
CLEO
Hello?
(beat)
Rani?
The door shuts behind them.
CLEO (CONTāD)
(beat)
Jordan, thereās no-one here...
JORDAN
This is so weird. Maybe we should do one...
Thereās a loud bleep following by an electronic whirring sound.
This sound fills the room, a huge hum that washes over everything in a digital wave. When RANI speaks her voice is accompanied by a fluid digital glitch ā not the Redaction, just whatever technology sheās using to communicate. Thereās a gusting, freezing wind in the background of her side of the call.
RANI
There you are. You took your time.
JORDAN
(Softly) Oh wow!
CLEO
What the Hell? How are you doing that?
RANI
I inherited some tech from an old
friend of mine. Holographic projection
courtesy of Mr Smith.
The line should sound a little glitchy.
CLEO
That is so Princess Leia, Iām obsessed.
RANI
Iām Rani Chandra.
CLEO
Yeah, I seen your pictures. Where are
you?
RANI
I canāt say.
CLEO
What are you doing?
RANI
Classified
CLEO
Who are you?
RANI
Itās better you donāt know.
CLEO
(Exasperated) Well this is gonna be fun then, innit?
RANI
Sorry. Er, I said to come alone.
JORDAN
(Trying it on) Easy Rani. Heard you were a journalist. That is fascinating.
CLEO
Shut up Jordan. Thatās my brother, Jordan.
RANI
Ok. (Beat)
I need your help.
CLEO
What can I do? Iām a theatre usher.
RANI
Your podcast. Weāve been tracking it.
CLEO
Wait wait wait, whoās we?
RANI
I canāt divulge that information
CLEO
(Getting annoyed) Iāve come to the scariest hotel in London for this?
You gotta give me something babe, or Iām outta here and getting a frappuccino.
RANI
Wait! A few of us have come together to try figure this out; people who knew him. Weāre the only ones left.
(Beat)
I canāt risk being with you in the room. It seems to be contagious.
People are vanishing and I canāt risk you too.
CLEO
For the love of god babe, please start making sense.
RANI
(Beat)
Ok, I need you to tattoo yourself with the following information.
CLEO
Am I on TV right now?
RANI
No, I really mean it! Itās vital you donāt forget. Tattoo this now. The Doctor in their TARDIS. Thatās it. You need to find him. Or her.
CLEO
Er, I donāt think so. Thatās worse than Live, Laugh, Love.
FX - we hear explosions. Gunfire.
Thereās a huge distant explosion over Raniās end of the line, rattling metal and breaking glass.
CLEO (CONT'D)
What was that?
RANI
Weāre under attack. They know the Doctorās gone, and theyāre starting to seize the advantage.
The sound of metal and breaking glass continues, it becomes clear thereās a huge fight happening in the background where Rani is.
CLEO
Who is they?
RANI
Listen. I donāt have long. You and yourā¦friend, need to keep searching for the Doctor. But please be careful.
CLEO
You said the Doctor was killing us!
RANI
(Resolute) I know the Doctor and this doesnāt make any sense. He would never hurt us⦠not intentionally.
But those of us who knew him are going missing. Vanishing. And I might be next. Everyone else has been erased: Luke, Clyde, Martha, Jo... theyāre all gone. There are three of us left and we are doing everything we can...
ROBOT VOICE
(Distant)
FREEZE. STAY WHERE YOU ARE.
FX ā RANI gasps, thereās a rapid fire of an alien gun
RANI
I need to go. I need to help the others.
CLEO
What do you want me to do? I donāt understand.
RANI
Find the Doctor. Only the Doctor can save us now. For godās sake, tattoo their name somewhere you can see it all the time. The Doctor and the TARDIS. A blue box...
CLEO
The blue box?!
RANI Yes! The TARDIS.
(Beat)
I can literally see you not writing this down.
Pause.
CLEO
Look. Rani, love. Youāve got the wrong girl! I work front-of-house at the Queen Vic Theatre. I sell bags of sweets, I canāt help you!
RANI
You can. I have heard your podcast. Itās good! OK, itās fine and you all need better mics but listen!
(Beat)
So many people are so willfully blind to the truth about our planet. They donāt want to see the darkness. You and Abby and Shawna believe. Cleo, I need you to believe that amazing things are possible. Can you do that?
CLEO
Babe, I turned myself into a woman from scratch, what do you think?
RANI
(Laughs fondly)
I like you, Cleo Proctor. And so will the Doctor. We need you. Find them.
FX - explosion. People start screaming.
ROBOT VOICE
(Louder this time) SURRENDER, HUMAN.
RANI
(Shouts) Everybody get dow -
FX - a crash and explosion, people screaming in the distance.
We continue to hear explosions, fire and people screaming throughout the rest of the episode.
CLEO
What the hell? Rani! Rani?!
JORDAN
Whereās she gone?
Heavy footsteps stomp ever closer.
CLEO
Oh my god. Jord, what is that..?
ROBOT VOICE HUMANS DETECTED.
The Robotās voice is heavily distorted and digital. Occasionally as it speaks, there are bubbles of beeps in a little trill, and higher pitched digital loading and processing sounds.
JORDAN
Can that see us..?
CLEO
Itās a hologram, isnāt it?
ROBOT VOICE CONNECTION ESTABLISHED. TRIANGULATING LOCATION.
CLEO
(Nervous) Jordan...
ROBOT VOICE
LONDON, ENGLAND. TARGET FIXED. TELEPORT IMMINENT.
JORDAN
No way...
ROBOT VOICE
ALL HUMANS MUST DIE.
END OF EPISODEThe low bassy surge of the Redacted Main Theme comes in, with its distinctive siren-like synths, rushing into a sudden glitch that dips into a slow, soft piano tune. CREDITS Doctor Who Redacted: Episode Two, by Juno Dawson. The piano tune keeps going for a moment before picking up the pass with a big beat of drums, strings and synths that turns into the Main Theme tune, a symphony of synths and strings revelling in alien weirdness. CREDITS Starring: Charlie Craggs, Lois Chimimba, Holly Quin-Ankrah, Jacob Hawley, Kieran Hodgson and Anjili Mohindra. Directed by Ella Watts and James Robinson, produced by Ella Watts. Sound design by David Thomas and Arlie Adlington. Original composition by David Devereux. A BBC Studios production. With a rush like the TARDIS, the main theme music gets even bigger and louder, turning into a big, bright, fast paced melody that plays to the end of the episode, when it stops abruptly with a sharp glitch which ends with a beep.
Podcast
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Doctor Who: Redacted
The return of the audio drama series, set in the worlds of Doctor Who.


