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5. Reboot
Cleo is hunted down by Honourās drones. Episode five of the audio drama series, set in the worlds of Doctor Who.
By Ken Cheng
Abby and Shawna go to meet Rani Chandra at Bannerman Road, but they arenāt expecting the house to be booby-trapped. Meanwhile Cleo is taken hostage by Honour Bray. She learns the truth of her twisted plan and meets the giant metal āCobotā tasked with carrying it out.
Cleo Proctor - Charlie Craggs
Abby McPhail - Lois Chimimba
Shawna Thompson - Holly Quin-Ankrah
Apex Costa - Freddy Carter
Honour Bray - Dervla Kirwan
Rani Chandra - Anjli Mohindra
Mr Smith - Alexander Armstrong
Drone - Wilf Scolding
Directed by Bethany Weimers
Producer: James Goss
Executive Producer: James Robinson
Sound design by Thea Cochrane
Original Composition by David Devereux
A BBC Studios Production for BBC Sounds
#DoctorWhoRedacted
New episodes released Mondays. If you're in the UK, listen to the full series of Doctor Who: Redacted first on BBC Sounds: bbc.in/42Ge0T0
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2.5 ā REBOOT
2.5 ā REBOOTby Ken Cheng
FX: BBC Sounds Sting
ANNO Doctor Who: Redacted, Episode Five. Reboot by Ken Cheng.
SCENE 5.1 ā INT. CLEOāS FLAT ā DAY
FX birds chirping, door opens, Apex walks in. Bed rustles as Cleo wakes.
CLEO Morning. Have you been out already?
APEX Itās 8:30
CLEO Let me guess, intergalactic jet lag?
APEX Something like that. Have you heard back from the Doctor?
FX: Fumbles for phone
CLEO Nah. Sorry - nothing. (YAWNS, SMILES) I had such a nicetime last night.
APEX I got you a gift.
FX he hands over magic flute
CLEO Your magic flute.
APEX Again, itās a waveform disruptor.
CLEO Magic Flute.
APEX Try the red button.
CLEO 'Kay.
FX button press.
CLEO Nothingās happening.
APEX Wait.
FX a pause, then some grand classical music
CLEO I love it. No-oneās everā¦never mind.
FX They embrace.
APEX Right letās do breakfast. Iāve booked a table somewhere in Mayfair. Sounded cheap.
CLEO You serious?
APEX No. That was a joke. I know what Mayfair is.
CLEO Youāre not allowed to do that! Wait, we canāt though, right? all the killer robots?
APEX (WINNING) Iām not going to let Honour scare me. Thereās no point in me staying if Iām not allowed to enjoy the thing I stayed for.
CLEO Awww...Iām a thing.
APEX It was meant to be romantic.
CLEO Donāt worry, it was.
APEX So. We can make plans over breakfast.
CLEO Sure. Letās just head to Greggs, though. Iāve got a good feeling about today.
FX Apexās space phone buzzes.
APEX Iāve got to get this, sorry.
CLEO You have a space phone?
APEX Yes.
CLEO Why didnāt you tell me you had a space phone?
APEX Different network. Space network. I really have to get [this]
CLEO Sure sure.
APEX (INTO PHONE) Hiii. (PAUSE) Yeah. I am. (LONG PAUSE)Right. Okay. Thanks.
CLEO Youāre making a bad news face.
APEX That was a contact. Legal-ish. Might be able to help get Honour off my back. Iāve got to go, like now. Do you mind?
CLEO Can I come?
APEX I donāt wanna get you involved. I wonāt be long, I promise. [BEAT] And then I can take you anywhere youād like. On this planet, or another of your choosing.
CLEO Deal.
APEX Perfect. Start thinking about where you wanna go.
FX He starts for the door. Rustle of bedclothes as Cleo throws the covers off and gets out.
CLEO So...when will you be back?
APEX Iāll be back here at 6. On the dot.
CLEO 6. Great. Iāll see you here at 6. Hope your friend is able to help out.
APEX Hopefully. Enjoy seeing your friend Greg.
FX Teleportation noisesSCENE 5.2 ā INT. BUS ā DAY
RANI (VOICE MESSAGE) Hello Abby, itās Rani Chandra here. Iāve got your message. And totally, Iām always happy to help fellow podcasters out. Especially as this could be good for both of us. Iām currently in New York so Iāll be touching down at Heathrow tomorrow morningā¦
FX Jet taking off.
RANI Okay Iām about to board! Iām pinning you an address, meet me there tomorrow at 11? Oh, and donāt go in until I arrive, got it?
SHAWNA Thatās the fifth time youāve listened to that Abbyā¦
ABBY Why does she want us to meet her at this place?
SHAWNA Itās a power move. Weāre the red squirrels and sheās the grey squirrel coming for our niche.
ABBY Come on Shawna.
SHAWNA Donāt you think it was a bit much with all the jet noises āoh I have to board now!ā Meanwhile, weāre riding the 112.
BUS (AUTOMATED ANNOUNCER) Next stop: Audley Road
SHAWNA Do you think other paranormal investigators stay at hostels and ask their clients to cover their bus fares?
ABBY (LAUGHS) Shawna, I think weāre the only paranormal investigators who ride the bus.
SHAWNA Right. Well either way Iām going to expense this.
(beat)
Will you stop checking your phone every 10 seconds? Sheāsprobably on airplane mode.
ABBY No itās not that, I was thinking about Cleo.
SHAWNA Oh right. Sheāll contact us when sheās ready.
ABBY I just feel awful. Iām not saying you went too far (SHE IS)
SHAWNA She made her choice. The wrong choice.
ABBY But, you donāt think sheās in danger? Like is HE dangerous?
SHAWNA [Beat] I donāt know.
ABBY Oh I think the next oneās our stop.
BUS (AUTOMATED) Next stop: Bannerman Road.
ABBY Yep, thatās us.
SCENE 5.3 ā EXT. OUTSIDE GREGGāS ā DAY
FX Cleo leaving Greggās
CLEO (MUTTERING TO HERSELF) No vegan sausage rolls, pull up your socks guysā¦
BYSTANDER (SCREAMING)
CLEO Oh here we goā¦
FX drone noises
DRONE Target acquired.
CLEO Another droneā¦what this time?
FX intense drone beeping
I got nothing for you unless you want a freaking bean and cheese pasty? Yeah, well have it anyway. (EFFORT AS)
FX She throws her pasty at the drone and starts running
See ya! (RUNNING) Oh no, oh come on.
DRONE Submit for questioning.
FX the drone hovers behind, speeding up
DRONE Submit.
FX the drone fires a warning shot, causing an explosion nearby
CLEO (SLOWING DOWN) Okay, okay. Okay, I should be okay under here.
FX footsteps become echoey and watery ā sheās under a canal bridge.
Okay, think I lost them.
(BEAT)
Oh come on...
FX sound of multiple drones closing in from several directions
DRONES Target acquired.
CLEO Whateverā¦I surrender?
HONOUR (RECORDING) Cleo Proctor, Honour Bray here. We werenāt properly introduced. Letās get coffee, woman to woman. I wonāt take no for an answer.
SCENE 5.4 ā EXT. 13 BANNERMAN ROAD ā DAY
ABBY Okay this is it. 13 Bannerman Road.
SHAWNA What is this place? I was expecting a studio or an office. It looks like some old lady lives here.
ABBY Doesnāt feel like anyone lives here. The weeds are taller than I am.
SHAWNA This place is giving meā¦a vibe. Not a good one. Really creepy. (BEAT) Right, shall we knock?
ABBY No! Rani told us to wait for her to arrive.
SHAWNA No way. I want to know what this place is Iām not standing on the street. People will think weāre burglars. Or worse, estate agents.
ABBY Whatās got into you Shawna?
SHAWNA I just...I just donāt like it when you donāt back us.
ABBY What do you mean?
SHAWNA Some cool hotshot podcaster with a private jet sponsored by JP Morgan comes along and you act like weāre two toddlers who didnāt face down UNIT and a world-ending apocalypse. This is what we do.ABBY Shawna...(sighs). Just be careful. Do NOT touch anything.
SHAWNA Yes! Thatās the Abby we all know and love!
SCENE 5.5 ā INT. 13 BANNERMAN ROAD ā DAY
FX knocking, followed by door creaking open
SHAWNA Looks like someoneās been here already.
ABBY (CALLING) Rani? Shawna, I donāt like this at all.
SHAWNA Itās okay, itās just an empty house in Ealing nothing is going to hurt us, well, nothingā¦supernatural.
FX Another door creaking open
ABBY Thereās still a lot of old furniture here.
SHAWNA Here; look at this photo.
ABBY Is that Rani? She looks so young. I wonder who the others are? Maybe this was her family home or something.
SHAWNA Iām going to search upstairs.
ABBY Wait-
SHAWNA (EFFORT) Itās fine, Abby! Iāll be ok, no ghosts or robots this time.
FX Shawna runs upstairs
ABBY (BEAT) Shawna!
SHAWNA (FROM UPSTAIRS) Thereās nothing up here - wait, I think thereās some attic stairs.
ABBY Absolutely not! Nothing good ever comes from searching an attic.
SHAWNA (FAINTER) Itās okay, the doorās just propped open. Thereās a weird noise coming from inside, though, Iāll see -
ABBY Shawna be careful! Donāt touch anything!
SHAWNA (SCREAMS) Abby!
FX Distant WOOOMPH of energy. Like sheās beenSWALLOWED.
ABBY Shawna?!SCENE 5.6 ā INT. WAREHOUSE - DAY
FX large metal door opening and closing, drone beeping sounds
CLEO Alright alright, Iām moving! You try climbing 100 steps in one go.
FX more beeping
CLEO We canāt all fly. All right then, whereās her ladyship?
FX smaller regular door opens
HONOUR (ENERGETIC) Sorry! Sorry! Got stuck in a meeting. Tell you what they donāt tell you about being this job is (WHISPERS) itās a lot of pointless meetings.
CLEO Whatās all this about?
HONOUR Have a seat. Is there anything you want? Coffee? Tea? Hot chocolate? Iām going to put the kettle on.
FX kettle being filled
CLEO A...peppermint tea?
HONOUR Ooh I like that ā I might well join you.
CLEO What is this place? What is all this stuff?
HONOUR Oh just my collection ā paintings, sculptures, artefacts. Doyou like them?
CLEO Err yeah sure. Did Apex steal all this?
HONOUR Not all of it. (BEAT) So youāre Cleo Proctor, Iām very fascinated to meet you properly. Of course Apex chose you, he does like them young and youāre...practically a child.
CLEO Youāre not that old are you?
HONOUR Iāve just turned 112.
CLEO (BEAT) OK. (BEAT) Sis, drop the skincare routine.
HONOUR Thereās a really thick fungal mucus you can find in the Argalian Swamp back on Origin, Iāll fetch you a batch if you want.
CLEO Iām good.
FX kettle finishes boiling.
HONOUR Bag in or bag out?CLEO In please.
HONOUR Great, a woman who knows what she wants. Iām like that you know. When I want something I really want something, do you know what I mean?
CLEO I guess so? I do want an air fryer.
HONOUR And I want a TARDIS.
CLEO Yeah, thatās the same.
HONOUR No no no it actually is, I think. You see, for you, an air fryer would be a massive improvement on your life! It represents stability, comfort, growth, am I making sense?
CLEO I just want to make frozen chips in 2 minutes.
HONOUR Right, but for you...that is a big deal, whereas I, Iāve already got an air fryer, probably, but at the end of the day Iām still working. Iām still in these endless meetings!
CLEO Youāve lost me.
HONOUR Cleo, itās the last TARDIS. Do you have any idea what that would go for on the open market? What certain parties would pay for time travel technology? I could retire right now.Unfortunately thatās where we, as in you and me, are at an impasse, because I know you know how I can get my TARDIS. And youāre not leaving here until I do.
CLEO What makes you think I have a TARDIS? I donāt even own my own flat, which also happens to be smaller on the inside.
HONOUR Look, Cleo. Youāre obviously really cool.
CLEO Awh thanks babe.
HONOUR I almost envy you. Your career, your future, your CV...your rent? You donāt seem to have any ambition at all! You just live your life, with no purpose or goal whatsoever. That must be freeing, one imagines.
CLEO Errr, is this still a compliment?
HONOUR I have worked so hard to get where I am, and yet itās you that people are still interested in. Apex...The Doctor? (BEAT) Yes, I know about the Doctor and I know they took a particular interest in you.
CLEO Honestly, weāre not exactly BFFs. If anything she ghosted me. [THE PENNY DROPS] And you would know what that feels like, wouldnāt you?SCENE 5.7 ā INT. BANNERMAN ROAD ATTIC ā DAY
FX energy sounds, Abby runs in
ABBY (RUNNING) Shawna! Are you okay?
SHAWNA (TRYING NOT TO SOUND STRESSED) Yes. Iām...fine. Itāsfine. Iām totally fine. My handās stuck to an actual forcefield.
ABBY Why would someone put a forcefield around a chimney?
SHAWNA My handās still stuck to it.
ABBY Well pull it out!
SHAWNA (sarcastic) Oh yeah I didnāt actually think to do that! Itās stuck, Abs! Properly, like cement.
ABBY I told you to not touch anything?!
SHAWNA You know sometimes you see a sign that says āWET PAINT DO NOT TOUCHā
ABBY Shawna this isnāt wet paint, itās a blimmin forcefield!
FX we hear a door slam
RANI (FROM AFAR) Hello? Abby, Shawna is that you?
ABBY Oh great. Thatās Rani.
SHAWNA Maybe she wonāt come upstairs.
FX feet race upstairs.
ABBY Sheās coming upstairs.
SHAWNA (STRUGGLING) Maybe I can get it out before she ā [gets here]
RANI (RUNNING IN) Oh my [god]ā¦ What happened here?!
ABBY Rani, hi -
SHAWNA Thanks for the warning on the booby trap!
RANI I literally did warn you, but go off.
ABBY Her armās going to be OK right?
RANI Relax, your arm is fine ā I know it looks bad but itās just an energy field. Nothing to be scared of. Objects can move through it one way but not the other. Thereās a bunch of security measures in place.
ABBY Why?
RANI I did say not to go into the house until I arrived.
SHAWNA I donāt know that must have been drowned out under the sounds of your private jet.
RANI It was not a private jet. (BEAT) Would I look this tired if it was?
ABBY Iām sorry we just barged in. The door was open.
RANI No Iām sorry. First forcefield?
SHAWNA Yeah.RANI You get used to them. Iāll get you out in a minute. Now, you needed my help?
ABBY We need to catch an alien thief.
RANI Thought so. Thatās actually why I met you here. I got a remote alarm triggered. Someone broke into Bannerman Road. I think theyāre after what I wanted to show you.
SHAWNA Thatās why Iām stuck to your wall?
RANI I promise you both this is all going to be fine. Relax. Have I already said that?
SHAWNA Reassuring.
RANI Do you trust me?
SHAWNA [SIGH] ...yeah alright.
RANI On the count of 3, push yourself directly forward as quickly as possible, make sure to keep every part of your body straight so it doesnāt get stuck in a weird angle.
SHAWNA Weird angle?!
RANI Are you ready?
SHAWNA Yes, well no, but yes!
RANI Youāre doing great. 1...2ā¦3...go!
SHAWNA (TERRIFIED) Ahhhhhhh!
FX energy noise ā sinister crackleSCENE 5.8 ā INT. HONOURāS WAREHOUSE ā DAY
HONOUR Ghosted?
CLEO That is what happened though isnāt it? You got ghosted?
HONOUR You donāt get where I am by wasting time or energy on men. I had bigger things to worry about.
CLEO Apex was different though, right? [PAUSE] He got under your skin didnāt he?
HONOUR (PAUSE) Itās not like that at all.
CLEO (STARTS LAUGHING) Oh my days! Hell hath no fury like awoman left on read. Iām so right!
HONOUR (ANNOYED NOW) This is purely business.
CLEO Your warehouse full of tat? What even is that painting anyway ā bit rubbish.
HONOUR That? That is an original Artemisia Gentileschi. Do you even know who that is?!
CLEO No. I still have a Britney poster in my room.
HONOUR She was the first woman to become accepted into the Accademia delle Arti del Disegno!
CLEO Yeah, but did she write Me Against the Music?
HONOUR That is... (HUUUUGE SIGH) You are so annoying. Why couldnāt you just make this simple? Why couldnāt you just tell me where to get the TARDIS?
CLEO All this stuff youāve hoarded and youāre still unhappy. Just another trust fund nepo baby whoās empty inside.
HONOUR (CHUCKLES) Shows what you know.
CLEO Am I wrong, though?
HONOUR You donāt know the first thing about me. I worked hard for this!Because I learned very early on that this world is cruel, and terrible, and thereās only one thing that people care about.
CLEO Oh? Whatās that?
HONOUR Stuff. Things, objects. I understood how much power they carry. I was a strange child. When I was 6, I would spend my time in the corner of the playground, collecting tiny, little pebbles, so tiny. But they could light up in the dark. I got called weird, every single day, but I loved them.
CLEO OK, so what?
HONOUR Well, I was able to curate quite the collection of pebbles.Suddenly people went āyou know what? Thatās actually coolā, children were jealous, and that: that is power. Me?Materialistic? Very well, but from nothing, I made myself very powerful.
CLEO Thatās...I guess I was wrong.
HONOUR In Apex, I finally thought I had met someone who shared my vision. Turns out, he was like all the rest; beneath me. A common thief; a spoiled, selfish little boy, terrified of his own feelings. And when he realises you donāt have anything he wants, heāll leave you too.SCENE 5.9 ā INT. BANNERMAN ATTIC ā DAY
RANI OK, she made it through the forcefield in one piece.
ABBY Was there a chance she might not?
RANI Uh
FX large energy noise
RANI Uh oh.
ABBY Rani? What is that?
RANI The bubbleās shrinking. Thatās not good.
ABBY What? Whatāll happen to Shawna?!
RANI It should be fine, we should have a few hours before it collapses completely.
ABBY What happens then?
RANI Thereās every chance the field will just dissipate without any harm to Shawnaā¦.
ABBY Orā¦?
RANI Ok, donāt panic. [BEAT] But it couldā¦it could crush her.Awkward silence.
ABBY Shawna! Youāve got to get her out of there!
RANI Itās okay, I have a plan. Not my first forcefield, remember. I need to get inside it.
ABBY Wait what??
RANI Itās the only way; thatās where the controls are.
ABBY What controls?
RANI Can I trust you to stay here? Whatever happens?
ABBY Yes, yes! Good luck.
RANI Thank you. Back in two secs. [BEAT] I hope. [EFFORT NOISE ā in case needed]
ABBY Wait! What happens if youāre -
FX slightly ominous energy noises
ABBY Not?SCENE 5.10 ā INT. HONOURāS WAREHOUSE ā NIGHT
CLEO Youāre wrong about Apex.
HONOUR Tell me, if he cares about you so much then where is he right now? Where. Is. He?
CLEO [BEAT] I donāt know! [BEAT] But I know he cares about me.
HONOUR Let me tell you something about Apex Costa, because I do know him. Youāre nothing. You are literally nothing to him. Just a means to an end.
CLEO Okayā¦
HONOUR All you have is a connection to the Doctor. As soon as he gets that out of you, heāll be gone in a heartbeat.
CLEO But he knows I canāt help him. He knows already! And he came back for me.
HONOUR This is what he does, Cleo, and heās very good at it. He makes women fall in love with him. Thatās his power. And he doesnāt use it for good.
CLEO [EUREKA MOMENT] Youāre still in love with him arenāt you? Is that why youāre doing all this, the refugees, the drones, the London Underground?
HONOUR OK, bored now. This is about a promise he made. A TARDIS.My TARDIS.FX drone powering up again
CLEO I donāt know how else to say this: I donāt know how to find the Doctor.
HONOUR You must know! Otherwise whatās his angle? Why is Apex so interested in you?!
CLEO We just...like each other?
HONOUR They always want something, even if itās just to feel wanted.
CLEO Maybe he just likes me more than you.
HONOUR Letās find out shall we? Letās find out what kind of man ApexCosta is. Will he come to your rescue?
FX button pressing, door shutters opening
CLEO What are you doing?
FX loud mechanical noises of drones attaching to each other
DRONES Drone 2 of 256 connected. Drone 3 of 256 connected. Drone4 of 256 connectedā¦
HONOUR You wanted an air fryer. I wanted a Cobotā¦SCENE 5.11 ā INT. BANNERMAN ATTIC
FX energy field noises
RANI (GASPS AS EMERGES) Shawna. You okay?
SHAWNA Rani! Whatās going on? Why canāt I see Abby?
RANI I know this is a bit overwhelming right now, but I have to let you know that this bubble is shrinking.
SHAWNA Shrinking?!
RANI Yes, but it should be fine ā we have plenty of time. At least acouple of hours before it collapses. We can fix this.
SHAWNA And weāre stuck together against a wall? Great. Whereās Abs?
RANI Other side of the field, sheās fine. [BEAT] Mr Smith, I need you.
Nothing happens.
SHAWNA Who?
RANI [IGNORES HER] Why isnāt that working? That should be working.
SHAWNA Whoās Mr Smith?RANI Mr Smith is a computer.
SHAWNA Sure. Why not?
FX ā Rani pops a metal hatch off the wall to access a panel.
RANI It has been a long, long time since Iāve done this. [BEAT] Letās see.
FX ā pushing buttons, a few sad error noises.
SHAWNA You have a computer hidden in your wall.
RANI OK. Looks like someone tried to break into Mr Smith. Heās been shut down a while ā whoever did this couldnāt get past the defence protocols, and for some reason they didnāt deactivate. Hmm. This isnāt good.
SHAWNA What isnāt good?
RANI [SMALL LAUGH] We used to ask Sarah Jane questions all the time.
SHAWNA Whoās Sarah Jane?
RANI Someone who, when the world was ending, would say āYouāre just going to have to trust me.ā And it all worked out fine. Now, youād better get started.
SHAWNA Me?RANI Shawna Thompson, this is a computer. Youāre a computer programmer.
SHAWNA Wait. You know that? Youāre not just a nice haircut are ya?
RANI You think my haircutās nice? Thank you.
SHAWNA Can I really help, or is this to distract me from being crushed by a forcefield? Because neither of us have been doing this anywhere near as long as you have and frankly...Iām scared.
RANI You really can help. (BEAT) Mr Smith has a defence protocol which is supposed to contain whoeverās trying to attack him, except thereās no one here, and itās not meant to shrink.
SHAWNA Whoever it was, could they have teleported out?
RANI Yes. Very good.
SHAWNA Weāve been on this case a while. Right. What OS does āMr Smithā run on?
RANI He doesnāt quite run on a normal Operating System.
SHAWNA Are we talking Linux? Ubuntu? TempleOS?
RANI Itās a Xylok.
SHAWNA Wait ā is that an alien OS? Wow. Okay. Wellā¦do alien computers have a database, does it respond to inputs, outputs, anything like that?
RANI Yes, backup data pad right here.
SHAWNA Okay, I can work with that. Every system has a hard reboot, Iām sure Mr Smith does too.FX failure sound, energy noises
SHAWNA What was that?
RANI The forcefield, itās shrinking faster.
FX key pad presses.
SHAWNA How much time do we have?
RANI No idea. (CRIES OUT) Ow. Itās burning.
SHAWNA (PAIN) Yep.
RANI Same energy spread over a smaller area. Keep away from it.Any luck?
SHAWNA (GRUNTS) Iām not sure I can get in in time. Is there some other way?
RANI No.
SHAWNA Sure?
RANI Well. Thereās something else we could try.
SHAWNA What?
RANI Complete overload. We ā Iād overload the deviceās power core. [BEAT] But itād be forever.
SHAWNA What arenāt you telling me?
RANI Mr Smith is more than a computer. Heās a friend. My oldest friend. A Xylok is a living thing. And Iād have to kill him.SCENE 5.12 ā INT. HONOURāS WAREHOUSE
FX ā The Cobot continues to click together- the count goes up quietly in the background.
DRONES Drone 254 of 256 connected. Drone 255 of 256 connected. Drone 256 of 256 connectedā¦COBOT assembling. Wave integrity holding.
CLEO Whatās a Cobot?
HONOUR My drones have assembled to create a giant robotic killing machine. Obviously.
FX: Two giant robotic footsteps.
COBOT Cobot assembly complete.
HONOUR: Your little boyfriend stole the tech from Torchwood for me.Please Cleo, just tell me how to find the Doctor, or my 20-foot friend here will clear out the entire London Underground.
CLEO This is insane! Theyāve done nothing to do you! Itās theirhome.
HONOUR I have new tenants lined up. And theyāll pay twice the rent.Earth is an up-and-coming area.
CLEO Leave them alone.HONOUR You know what you have to do.
COBOT Cobot armed and ready.
CLEO Honour, I canāt get to the Doctor. If I could, I would.
HONOUR Then weāre done here.
FX she stands. Starts to walk out.
CLEO What? So what was the point of bringing me here, other than to show me your air fryer.
HONOUR Target practice. (SMILES) Move and my Cobot will execute you. Then, once youāre atoms, it will carry out its instructions and clear the London Underground.
CLEO Thatās cold and I have a date to get to.
HONOUR (SMILES) You really think heāll show up? Do you want to know where Apex is right now? Heās getting me my TARDIS.
CLEO No. You are so wrong about him.
HONOUR Am I? Nice talking, Cleo.
FX And she walks out and the door slams. The Cobot hums sinisterly.SCENE 5.13 ā INT. BANNERMAN ATTIC ā NIGHT
FX Energy crackles sinisterly.
SHAWNA What? You canāt kill him if heās a friend.
RANI I have to. Mr Smith controls all the security measures. I donāt want to do this, but we are running out of time. The fieldās getting smaller and smallerā¦
SHAWNA How long would the overload take?
RANI 60 seconds, maybe?
SHAWNA OK. Give me two minutes.
FX hacker speed typing!
RANI What are you hoping to find?
SHAWNA Every system has a hard reboot, a CTRL+ALT+DELETE, I just need to find out how to do it.
RANI How do you understand any of this?
SHAWNA You said he was alive? I think heās designed himself for human users. Iā¦kinda get it.
RANI That makes sense heās a good egg. Mostly, a very good egg. SHAWNA I can do this.
FX energy field is getting louder and closer
RANI Shawnaā¦Shawna! (PAIN) The forcefield. Donāt let it touch you ā I think itās lethal now!
SHAWNA Okay. Okay. I can find the reboot on the systemā¦
RANI (PANICKING) Itās getting faster!
FX energy field increasing still, very loud
SHAWNA Itās here! Itās here! There was a reboot, years ago. I canreactivate it!
RANI (PAIN) Shawna, thereās no time.
SHAWNA Wait...
RANI Shawna!
FX And the energy field roars!SCENE 5.14 ā INT. HONOURāS WAREHOUSE
FX The cobot beeps at Cleo.
CLEO Just so you know Iāve got a date in 20 minutes.
FX The cobot bleeps faster.
COBOT Do not move.
CLEO Chill. Iām just gonna sit here, minding my own business, and drink my peppermint tea.
FX Cleo sips tea.
CLEO (SIPS) Iām up against a bit of a deadline here. Youāre held together with magnets, yeah?
COBOT A wave integrity field.
CLEO Nice.
FX Cleo takes magic flute from her pocket
CLEO Hey do you know what this is? Apex gave it to me. Itās a magic flute.
COBOT Correction. It is a wave disruptor.CLEO Whatever. Itās got a lot of buttons and sort of works on rats.As I said. Iām on a deadline, so Iām just going to ā
FX Cleo activates magic flute ā frantic pulse. Cobot takes the hit
DRONES WILDTRACK Field integrity collapsing. Drone 256 of 256 disconnectedā¦Drone 2 of 256 Disconnected. Drone 134 of 256 disconnected.Cobot disassembling!
FX With a burble of Drones, the Cobot lands in a heap on the floor.
CLEO Push all the buttons at once. [BEAT] Itās almost 6 oāclock. I gotta find Apex.
FX Cleo yanks the door opens and runs for it.SCENE 5.15 ā INT. BANNERMAN ROAD.
FX The forcefield reaches fever pitch.
RANI Shawna! Quick!
SHAWNA Andā¦reset!
FX The forcefield dissipates.
SHAWNA Oh wow. It worked. That actually worked!
RANI You did it!
FX: Abby races over.
ABBY Shawna!
SHAWNA Abby!
FX: They hug.
ABBY Donāt you EVER put your hand in another force field again. I swear to God.
RANI Iām so sorry. This honestly wasnāt meant to be so dramatic.You said someone was stealing alien artefacts? The reason I was in New York was because of my friend Luke - thereās been a raid there. The world is being cleaned out of alien technology. And now theyāve come for Mr Smith. This is personal.
ABBY We know who the thief is. But we donāt know what he wants.
RANI Shall we get on that? I think Mr Smithās rebooted.
SHAWNA Should be safe.
RANI OK. Here goes. Stand back. [BEAT] Mr Smith, I need you.
FX Mr Smith fanfare plays, as he unpacks from the fireplace
ABBY
Thereās a computer-
SHAWNA In the wall, yeah.
MR SMITH Hello, Rani. How are you?
RANI Iāve never been so glad to hear your voice.
ABBY Whooaaa.
RANI Mr Smith, this is ā
MR SMITH Abigail MacPhail and Shawna Thompson. Hosts of the Blue Box Files. Sarah, Sarah Jane programmed me to track any discourse pertaining to the TARDIS or the Doctor.
SHAWNA What? The Doctor! Cleo was right -ABBY This isā¦incredible.
SHAWNA Yeah I canāt believe you were going to destroy this.
MR SMITH Excuse me?
RANI Nothing! [BEAT] What happened here, Mr Smith?
MR SMITH An intruder tried to access my database. They were looking for the whereabouts of the Doctor.
FX Blip! Footage plays ā Mr Smith being wrenched apart
APEX (ANNOYED) Come on! Iāve got to find the Doctor. I have to!Just give me his location, you piece of ā
FX Blip
SHAWNA Apex. We were right about him.
ABBY Poor Cleo.
RANI Did he find anything?
MR SMITH They did not find out where the Doctor is because I do not know where the Doctor is.
RANI You donāt know?
MR SMITH The Doctor is missing. Something is amiss with their timeline.
RANI Thatās not good.
ABBY What does this mean?RANI The Doctor canāt be missing, at least, not to Mr Smith.Somethingās gone really wrong. (BEAT) Mr Smith, prepare tosend out a distress call on all available channels.
MR SMITH Broadcasting on all intergalactic frequencies.
RANI Attention to anyone out there who can help: The Doctor is missing, I repeat, the Doctor is missing.SCENE 5.16 ā INT. CLEOāS FLAT ā NIGHT
FX Cleo entering flat front door.
CLEO (out of breath) Okay, only seven minutes late. He better have waited.
FX puts jacket down
CLEO Apex? You here? Iām here, Iām so sorry Iām late! Youāll never guess where Iāve beenā¦Apex?
FX opens bedroom door.
CLEO Apex?
FX A small box projects a hologram of Apex.
CLEO What?
APEX (RECORDED) Hi Cleo, just leaving you a quick hologram. I had a really great time last night. You know that, right? But I canāt fix this. Iāve got no-one left to turn to for help. I got in way over my head this timeā¦so Iā¦Iām sorry. This is really terrible timing because yesterdayā¦last nightā¦it was one ofā¦it was amazing. [PAUSE] The Doctorās not coming. I canāt save London Underground and I donāt wanna put you in danger. Itās better for everyone if I just go. Maybeā¦maybe Honour will come after me, not you guys.
CLEO You canātā¦APEX [RECORDING] Maybe when this blows over we can reconnect. Until then, I..umā¦see ya Cleo.
FX hologram powers down
CLEO No wayā¦he canāt do this to me.
FX she picks up the box, throws it against the wall
CLEO Iām such an idiot. You idiot! [BEAT] I canāt believe Iā¦[BEAT] Nope. Not this time.
FX: She opens her phone. Records a voice note.
CLEO [RECORDING] This is Cleo Proctor from the Blue Box Files, recording what might be my final entry. Abs, Shawna (BEAT) Iām going to London Underground. Honour is going to clear out the refugees and they have no idea whatās coming.Someoneās got to help them.Thereās no Apex, thereās no Doctor, and I donāt know where you guys are. Iām the only one left. Iām on my own. I did it before and I can do it again. [BEAT] Oh, and Apex, if you ever hear this, get some therapy, you absolute manchild.SCENE 5.17 ā INT. THE LONDON UNDERGROUND ā NIGHT
FX Same effect from Episode 3 ā the light tunnel into London Underground. She hops off with a yelp.
CLEO OK, that wasnāt so bad. (echoey) Hello?! Is anyone down there?
FX She runs down the echoey tunnels.
CLEO [QUIET] Where the hell is everyone? Last time it was jumpinā jumpinā down here. Hello?
FX Distance footfall. Heavy.
CLEO Hello? Listen ā if youāre hiding, we need to run. Honour is coming. And sheās bringingā¦
FX The footfalls get heavier and heavier. A march.
CLEO Sheās bringing a really, really big robot called..
COBOT Cobot detecting life form.
CLEO You again?
COBOT Cobot armed and ready.
FX Cleo pulls out magic flute as the Cobot advances.
CLEO (BRAVE) Iām armed. Remember what happened last time? Iām Cleo Proctor and Iām going to stop you.
FX The footsteps get really, really heavy. Stops.
COBOT
Wave disruptor bypassed. You have no other weapons.
CLEO No.
FX The Cobot regards her. Sinister operational hum.
COBOT
Step aside or you will be eliminated.
CLEO Just leave them alone.
COBOT Step aside human female.
CLEO No, Iām not letting you into that camp.
COBOT Step aside. Final warning.
CLEO They arenāt hurting anyone. (BEAT) Honour? Honour, can you hear me? Just leave them alone!
COBOT Obstructions will be destroyed.
FX The cobot grabs Cleo, who screams.
CLEO No! Let go!
COBOT Fatal force permitted.
Cleo screams in pain.
The music builds into a gleefully Whovian, alien symphony of synths and electric keyboard that cuts off into piano that continues under the rest of the credits.
END CREDITS Doctor Who: Redacted. Episode Five. Reboot by Ken Cheng. Starring Charlie Craggs as Cleo Proctor, Lois Chimimba Abby Mcphail, Holly Quin-Ankrah Shawna Thompson, Freddy Carter Apex Costa, Dervla Kirwan Honour Bray, Anji Mohindra Rani Chandra, Alexander Armstrong Mr Smith and Wilf Scolding as drone. Directed by Bethany Weimers, Producer James Goss, Sound design by Thea Cochrane, Original Composition by David Devereux. A BBC Studios Production for BBC Sounds.
FX: BBC Sounds Sting
ANNO Doctor Who: Redacted, Episode Five. Reboot by Ken Cheng.
SCENE 5.1 ā INT. CLEOāS FLAT ā DAY
FX birds chirping, door opens, Apex walks in. Bed rustles as Cleo wakes.
CLEO Morning. Have you been out already?
APEX Itās 8:30
CLEO Let me guess, intergalactic jet lag?
APEX Something like that. Have you heard back from the Doctor?
FX: Fumbles for phone
CLEO Nah. Sorry - nothing. (YAWNS, SMILES) I had such a nicetime last night.
APEX I got you a gift.
FX he hands over magic flute
CLEO Your magic flute.
APEX Again, itās a waveform disruptor.
CLEO Magic Flute.
APEX Try the red button.
CLEO 'Kay.
FX button press.
CLEO Nothingās happening.
APEX Wait.
FX a pause, then some grand classical music
CLEO I love it. No-oneās everā¦never mind.
FX They embrace.
APEX Right letās do breakfast. Iāve booked a table somewhere in Mayfair. Sounded cheap.
CLEO You serious?
APEX No. That was a joke. I know what Mayfair is.
CLEO Youāre not allowed to do that! Wait, we canāt though, right? all the killer robots?
APEX (WINNING) Iām not going to let Honour scare me. Thereās no point in me staying if Iām not allowed to enjoy the thing I stayed for.
CLEO Awww...Iām a thing.
APEX It was meant to be romantic.
CLEO Donāt worry, it was.
APEX So. We can make plans over breakfast.
CLEO Sure. Letās just head to Greggs, though. Iāve got a good feeling about today.
FX Apexās space phone buzzes.
APEX Iāve got to get this, sorry.
CLEO You have a space phone?
APEX Yes.
CLEO Why didnāt you tell me you had a space phone?
APEX Different network. Space network. I really have to get [this]
CLEO Sure sure.
APEX (INTO PHONE) Hiii. (PAUSE) Yeah. I am. (LONG PAUSE)Right. Okay. Thanks.
CLEO Youāre making a bad news face.
APEX That was a contact. Legal-ish. Might be able to help get Honour off my back. Iāve got to go, like now. Do you mind?
CLEO Can I come?
APEX I donāt wanna get you involved. I wonāt be long, I promise. [BEAT] And then I can take you anywhere youād like. On this planet, or another of your choosing.
CLEO Deal.
APEX Perfect. Start thinking about where you wanna go.
FX He starts for the door. Rustle of bedclothes as Cleo throws the covers off and gets out.
CLEO So...when will you be back?
APEX Iāll be back here at 6. On the dot.
CLEO 6. Great. Iāll see you here at 6. Hope your friend is able to help out.
APEX Hopefully. Enjoy seeing your friend Greg.
FX Teleportation noisesSCENE 5.2 ā INT. BUS ā DAY
RANI (VOICE MESSAGE) Hello Abby, itās Rani Chandra here. Iāve got your message. And totally, Iām always happy to help fellow podcasters out. Especially as this could be good for both of us. Iām currently in New York so Iāll be touching down at Heathrow tomorrow morningā¦
FX Jet taking off.
RANI Okay Iām about to board! Iām pinning you an address, meet me there tomorrow at 11? Oh, and donāt go in until I arrive, got it?
SHAWNA Thatās the fifth time youāve listened to that Abbyā¦
ABBY Why does she want us to meet her at this place?
SHAWNA Itās a power move. Weāre the red squirrels and sheās the grey squirrel coming for our niche.
ABBY Come on Shawna.
SHAWNA Donāt you think it was a bit much with all the jet noises āoh I have to board now!ā Meanwhile, weāre riding the 112.
BUS (AUTOMATED ANNOUNCER) Next stop: Audley Road
SHAWNA Do you think other paranormal investigators stay at hostels and ask their clients to cover their bus fares?
ABBY (LAUGHS) Shawna, I think weāre the only paranormal investigators who ride the bus.
SHAWNA Right. Well either way Iām going to expense this.
(beat)
Will you stop checking your phone every 10 seconds? Sheāsprobably on airplane mode.
ABBY No itās not that, I was thinking about Cleo.
SHAWNA Oh right. Sheāll contact us when sheās ready.
ABBY I just feel awful. Iām not saying you went too far (SHE IS)
SHAWNA She made her choice. The wrong choice.
ABBY But, you donāt think sheās in danger? Like is HE dangerous?
SHAWNA [Beat] I donāt know.
ABBY Oh I think the next oneās our stop.
BUS (AUTOMATED) Next stop: Bannerman Road.
ABBY Yep, thatās us.
SCENE 5.3 ā EXT. OUTSIDE GREGGāS ā DAY
FX Cleo leaving Greggās
CLEO (MUTTERING TO HERSELF) No vegan sausage rolls, pull up your socks guysā¦
BYSTANDER (SCREAMING)
CLEO Oh here we goā¦
FX drone noises
DRONE Target acquired.
CLEO Another droneā¦what this time?
FX intense drone beeping
I got nothing for you unless you want a freaking bean and cheese pasty? Yeah, well have it anyway. (EFFORT AS)
FX She throws her pasty at the drone and starts running
See ya! (RUNNING) Oh no, oh come on.
DRONE Submit for questioning.
FX the drone hovers behind, speeding up
DRONE Submit.
FX the drone fires a warning shot, causing an explosion nearby
CLEO (SLOWING DOWN) Okay, okay. Okay, I should be okay under here.
FX footsteps become echoey and watery ā sheās under a canal bridge.
Okay, think I lost them.
(BEAT)
Oh come on...
FX sound of multiple drones closing in from several directions
DRONES Target acquired.
CLEO Whateverā¦I surrender?
HONOUR (RECORDING) Cleo Proctor, Honour Bray here. We werenāt properly introduced. Letās get coffee, woman to woman. I wonāt take no for an answer.
SCENE 5.4 ā EXT. 13 BANNERMAN ROAD ā DAY
ABBY Okay this is it. 13 Bannerman Road.
SHAWNA What is this place? I was expecting a studio or an office. It looks like some old lady lives here.
ABBY Doesnāt feel like anyone lives here. The weeds are taller than I am.
SHAWNA This place is giving meā¦a vibe. Not a good one. Really creepy. (BEAT) Right, shall we knock?
ABBY No! Rani told us to wait for her to arrive.
SHAWNA No way. I want to know what this place is Iām not standing on the street. People will think weāre burglars. Or worse, estate agents.
ABBY Whatās got into you Shawna?
SHAWNA I just...I just donāt like it when you donāt back us.
ABBY What do you mean?
SHAWNA Some cool hotshot podcaster with a private jet sponsored by JP Morgan comes along and you act like weāre two toddlers who didnāt face down UNIT and a world-ending apocalypse. This is what we do.ABBY Shawna...(sighs). Just be careful. Do NOT touch anything.
SHAWNA Yes! Thatās the Abby we all know and love!
SCENE 5.5 ā INT. 13 BANNERMAN ROAD ā DAY
FX knocking, followed by door creaking open
SHAWNA Looks like someoneās been here already.
ABBY (CALLING) Rani? Shawna, I donāt like this at all.
SHAWNA Itās okay, itās just an empty house in Ealing nothing is going to hurt us, well, nothingā¦supernatural.
FX Another door creaking open
ABBY Thereās still a lot of old furniture here.
SHAWNA Here; look at this photo.
ABBY Is that Rani? She looks so young. I wonder who the others are? Maybe this was her family home or something.
SHAWNA Iām going to search upstairs.
ABBY Wait-
SHAWNA (EFFORT) Itās fine, Abby! Iāll be ok, no ghosts or robots this time.
FX Shawna runs upstairs
ABBY (BEAT) Shawna!
SHAWNA (FROM UPSTAIRS) Thereās nothing up here - wait, I think thereās some attic stairs.
ABBY Absolutely not! Nothing good ever comes from searching an attic.
SHAWNA (FAINTER) Itās okay, the doorās just propped open. Thereās a weird noise coming from inside, though, Iāll see -
ABBY Shawna be careful! Donāt touch anything!
SHAWNA (SCREAMS) Abby!
FX Distant WOOOMPH of energy. Like sheās beenSWALLOWED.
ABBY Shawna?!SCENE 5.6 ā INT. WAREHOUSE - DAY
FX large metal door opening and closing, drone beeping sounds
CLEO Alright alright, Iām moving! You try climbing 100 steps in one go.
FX more beeping
CLEO We canāt all fly. All right then, whereās her ladyship?
FX smaller regular door opens
HONOUR (ENERGETIC) Sorry! Sorry! Got stuck in a meeting. Tell you what they donāt tell you about being this job is (WHISPERS) itās a lot of pointless meetings.
CLEO Whatās all this about?
HONOUR Have a seat. Is there anything you want? Coffee? Tea? Hot chocolate? Iām going to put the kettle on.
FX kettle being filled
CLEO A...peppermint tea?
HONOUR Ooh I like that ā I might well join you.
CLEO What is this place? What is all this stuff?
HONOUR Oh just my collection ā paintings, sculptures, artefacts. Doyou like them?
CLEO Err yeah sure. Did Apex steal all this?
HONOUR Not all of it. (BEAT) So youāre Cleo Proctor, Iām very fascinated to meet you properly. Of course Apex chose you, he does like them young and youāre...practically a child.
CLEO Youāre not that old are you?
HONOUR Iāve just turned 112.
CLEO (BEAT) OK. (BEAT) Sis, drop the skincare routine.
HONOUR Thereās a really thick fungal mucus you can find in the Argalian Swamp back on Origin, Iāll fetch you a batch if you want.
CLEO Iām good.
FX kettle finishes boiling.
HONOUR Bag in or bag out?CLEO In please.
HONOUR Great, a woman who knows what she wants. Iām like that you know. When I want something I really want something, do you know what I mean?
CLEO I guess so? I do want an air fryer.
HONOUR And I want a TARDIS.
CLEO Yeah, thatās the same.
HONOUR No no no it actually is, I think. You see, for you, an air fryer would be a massive improvement on your life! It represents stability, comfort, growth, am I making sense?
CLEO I just want to make frozen chips in 2 minutes.
HONOUR Right, but for you...that is a big deal, whereas I, Iāve already got an air fryer, probably, but at the end of the day Iām still working. Iām still in these endless meetings!
CLEO Youāve lost me.
HONOUR Cleo, itās the last TARDIS. Do you have any idea what that would go for on the open market? What certain parties would pay for time travel technology? I could retire right now.Unfortunately thatās where we, as in you and me, are at an impasse, because I know you know how I can get my TARDIS. And youāre not leaving here until I do.
CLEO What makes you think I have a TARDIS? I donāt even own my own flat, which also happens to be smaller on the inside.
HONOUR Look, Cleo. Youāre obviously really cool.
CLEO Awh thanks babe.
HONOUR I almost envy you. Your career, your future, your CV...your rent? You donāt seem to have any ambition at all! You just live your life, with no purpose or goal whatsoever. That must be freeing, one imagines.
CLEO Errr, is this still a compliment?
HONOUR I have worked so hard to get where I am, and yet itās you that people are still interested in. Apex...The Doctor? (BEAT) Yes, I know about the Doctor and I know they took a particular interest in you.
CLEO Honestly, weāre not exactly BFFs. If anything she ghosted me. [THE PENNY DROPS] And you would know what that feels like, wouldnāt you?SCENE 5.7 ā INT. BANNERMAN ROAD ATTIC ā DAY
FX energy sounds, Abby runs in
ABBY (RUNNING) Shawna! Are you okay?
SHAWNA (TRYING NOT TO SOUND STRESSED) Yes. Iām...fine. Itāsfine. Iām totally fine. My handās stuck to an actual forcefield.
ABBY Why would someone put a forcefield around a chimney?
SHAWNA My handās still stuck to it.
ABBY Well pull it out!
SHAWNA (sarcastic) Oh yeah I didnāt actually think to do that! Itās stuck, Abs! Properly, like cement.
ABBY I told you to not touch anything?!
SHAWNA You know sometimes you see a sign that says āWET PAINT DO NOT TOUCHā
ABBY Shawna this isnāt wet paint, itās a blimmin forcefield!
FX we hear a door slam
RANI (FROM AFAR) Hello? Abby, Shawna is that you?
ABBY Oh great. Thatās Rani.
SHAWNA Maybe she wonāt come upstairs.
FX feet race upstairs.
ABBY Sheās coming upstairs.
SHAWNA (STRUGGLING) Maybe I can get it out before she ā [gets here]
RANI (RUNNING IN) Oh my [god]ā¦ What happened here?!
ABBY Rani, hi -
SHAWNA Thanks for the warning on the booby trap!
RANI I literally did warn you, but go off.
ABBY Her armās going to be OK right?
RANI Relax, your arm is fine ā I know it looks bad but itās just an energy field. Nothing to be scared of. Objects can move through it one way but not the other. Thereās a bunch of security measures in place.
ABBY Why?
RANI I did say not to go into the house until I arrived.
SHAWNA I donāt know that must have been drowned out under the sounds of your private jet.
RANI It was not a private jet. (BEAT) Would I look this tired if it was?
ABBY Iām sorry we just barged in. The door was open.
RANI No Iām sorry. First forcefield?
SHAWNA Yeah.RANI You get used to them. Iāll get you out in a minute. Now, you needed my help?
ABBY We need to catch an alien thief.
RANI Thought so. Thatās actually why I met you here. I got a remote alarm triggered. Someone broke into Bannerman Road. I think theyāre after what I wanted to show you.
SHAWNA Thatās why Iām stuck to your wall?
RANI I promise you both this is all going to be fine. Relax. Have I already said that?
SHAWNA Reassuring.
RANI Do you trust me?
SHAWNA [SIGH] ...yeah alright.
RANI On the count of 3, push yourself directly forward as quickly as possible, make sure to keep every part of your body straight so it doesnāt get stuck in a weird angle.
SHAWNA Weird angle?!
RANI Are you ready?
SHAWNA Yes, well no, but yes!
RANI Youāre doing great. 1...2ā¦3...go!
SHAWNA (TERRIFIED) Ahhhhhhh!
FX energy noise ā sinister crackleSCENE 5.8 ā INT. HONOURāS WAREHOUSE ā DAY
HONOUR Ghosted?
CLEO That is what happened though isnāt it? You got ghosted?
HONOUR You donāt get where I am by wasting time or energy on men. I had bigger things to worry about.
CLEO Apex was different though, right? [PAUSE] He got under your skin didnāt he?
HONOUR (PAUSE) Itās not like that at all.
CLEO (STARTS LAUGHING) Oh my days! Hell hath no fury like awoman left on read. Iām so right!
HONOUR (ANNOYED NOW) This is purely business.
CLEO Your warehouse full of tat? What even is that painting anyway ā bit rubbish.
HONOUR That? That is an original Artemisia Gentileschi. Do you even know who that is?!
CLEO No. I still have a Britney poster in my room.
HONOUR She was the first woman to become accepted into the Accademia delle Arti del Disegno!
CLEO Yeah, but did she write Me Against the Music?
HONOUR That is... (HUUUUGE SIGH) You are so annoying. Why couldnāt you just make this simple? Why couldnāt you just tell me where to get the TARDIS?
CLEO All this stuff youāve hoarded and youāre still unhappy. Just another trust fund nepo baby whoās empty inside.
HONOUR (CHUCKLES) Shows what you know.
CLEO Am I wrong, though?
HONOUR You donāt know the first thing about me. I worked hard for this!Because I learned very early on that this world is cruel, and terrible, and thereās only one thing that people care about.
CLEO Oh? Whatās that?
HONOUR Stuff. Things, objects. I understood how much power they carry. I was a strange child. When I was 6, I would spend my time in the corner of the playground, collecting tiny, little pebbles, so tiny. But they could light up in the dark. I got called weird, every single day, but I loved them.
CLEO OK, so what?
HONOUR Well, I was able to curate quite the collection of pebbles.Suddenly people went āyou know what? Thatās actually coolā, children were jealous, and that: that is power. Me?Materialistic? Very well, but from nothing, I made myself very powerful.
CLEO Thatās...I guess I was wrong.
HONOUR In Apex, I finally thought I had met someone who shared my vision. Turns out, he was like all the rest; beneath me. A common thief; a spoiled, selfish little boy, terrified of his own feelings. And when he realises you donāt have anything he wants, heāll leave you too.SCENE 5.9 ā INT. BANNERMAN ATTIC ā DAY
RANI OK, she made it through the forcefield in one piece.
ABBY Was there a chance she might not?
RANI Uh
FX large energy noise
RANI Uh oh.
ABBY Rani? What is that?
RANI The bubbleās shrinking. Thatās not good.
ABBY What? Whatāll happen to Shawna?!
RANI It should be fine, we should have a few hours before it collapses completely.
ABBY What happens then?
RANI Thereās every chance the field will just dissipate without any harm to Shawnaā¦.
ABBY Orā¦?
RANI Ok, donāt panic. [BEAT] But it couldā¦it could crush her.Awkward silence.
ABBY Shawna! Youāve got to get her out of there!
RANI Itās okay, I have a plan. Not my first forcefield, remember. I need to get inside it.
ABBY Wait what??
RANI Itās the only way; thatās where the controls are.
ABBY What controls?
RANI Can I trust you to stay here? Whatever happens?
ABBY Yes, yes! Good luck.
RANI Thank you. Back in two secs. [BEAT] I hope. [EFFORT NOISE ā in case needed]
ABBY Wait! What happens if youāre -
FX slightly ominous energy noises
ABBY Not?SCENE 5.10 ā INT. HONOURāS WAREHOUSE ā NIGHT
CLEO Youāre wrong about Apex.
HONOUR Tell me, if he cares about you so much then where is he right now? Where. Is. He?
CLEO [BEAT] I donāt know! [BEAT] But I know he cares about me.
HONOUR Let me tell you something about Apex Costa, because I do know him. Youāre nothing. You are literally nothing to him. Just a means to an end.
CLEO Okayā¦
HONOUR All you have is a connection to the Doctor. As soon as he gets that out of you, heāll be gone in a heartbeat.
CLEO But he knows I canāt help him. He knows already! And he came back for me.
HONOUR This is what he does, Cleo, and heās very good at it. He makes women fall in love with him. Thatās his power. And he doesnāt use it for good.
CLEO [EUREKA MOMENT] Youāre still in love with him arenāt you? Is that why youāre doing all this, the refugees, the drones, the London Underground?
HONOUR OK, bored now. This is about a promise he made. A TARDIS.My TARDIS.FX drone powering up again
CLEO I donāt know how else to say this: I donāt know how to find the Doctor.
HONOUR You must know! Otherwise whatās his angle? Why is Apex so interested in you?!
CLEO We just...like each other?
HONOUR They always want something, even if itās just to feel wanted.
CLEO Maybe he just likes me more than you.
HONOUR Letās find out shall we? Letās find out what kind of man ApexCosta is. Will he come to your rescue?
FX button pressing, door shutters opening
CLEO What are you doing?
FX loud mechanical noises of drones attaching to each other
DRONES Drone 2 of 256 connected. Drone 3 of 256 connected. Drone4 of 256 connectedā¦
HONOUR You wanted an air fryer. I wanted a Cobotā¦SCENE 5.11 ā INT. BANNERMAN ATTIC
FX energy field noises
RANI (GASPS AS EMERGES) Shawna. You okay?
SHAWNA Rani! Whatās going on? Why canāt I see Abby?
RANI I know this is a bit overwhelming right now, but I have to let you know that this bubble is shrinking.
SHAWNA Shrinking?!
RANI Yes, but it should be fine ā we have plenty of time. At least acouple of hours before it collapses. We can fix this.
SHAWNA And weāre stuck together against a wall? Great. Whereās Abs?
RANI Other side of the field, sheās fine. [BEAT] Mr Smith, I need you.
Nothing happens.
SHAWNA Who?
RANI [IGNORES HER] Why isnāt that working? That should be working.
SHAWNA Whoās Mr Smith?RANI Mr Smith is a computer.
SHAWNA Sure. Why not?
FX ā Rani pops a metal hatch off the wall to access a panel.
RANI It has been a long, long time since Iāve done this. [BEAT] Letās see.
FX ā pushing buttons, a few sad error noises.
SHAWNA You have a computer hidden in your wall.
RANI OK. Looks like someone tried to break into Mr Smith. Heās been shut down a while ā whoever did this couldnāt get past the defence protocols, and for some reason they didnāt deactivate. Hmm. This isnāt good.
SHAWNA What isnāt good?
RANI [SMALL LAUGH] We used to ask Sarah Jane questions all the time.
SHAWNA Whoās Sarah Jane?
RANI Someone who, when the world was ending, would say āYouāre just going to have to trust me.ā And it all worked out fine. Now, youād better get started.
SHAWNA Me?RANI Shawna Thompson, this is a computer. Youāre a computer programmer.
SHAWNA Wait. You know that? Youāre not just a nice haircut are ya?
RANI You think my haircutās nice? Thank you.
SHAWNA Can I really help, or is this to distract me from being crushed by a forcefield? Because neither of us have been doing this anywhere near as long as you have and frankly...Iām scared.
RANI You really can help. (BEAT) Mr Smith has a defence protocol which is supposed to contain whoeverās trying to attack him, except thereās no one here, and itās not meant to shrink.
SHAWNA Whoever it was, could they have teleported out?
RANI Yes. Very good.
SHAWNA Weāve been on this case a while. Right. What OS does āMr Smithā run on?
RANI He doesnāt quite run on a normal Operating System.
SHAWNA Are we talking Linux? Ubuntu? TempleOS?
RANI Itās a Xylok.
SHAWNA Wait ā is that an alien OS? Wow. Okay. Wellā¦do alien computers have a database, does it respond to inputs, outputs, anything like that?
RANI Yes, backup data pad right here.
SHAWNA Okay, I can work with that. Every system has a hard reboot, Iām sure Mr Smith does too.FX failure sound, energy noises
SHAWNA What was that?
RANI The forcefield, itās shrinking faster.
FX key pad presses.
SHAWNA How much time do we have?
RANI No idea. (CRIES OUT) Ow. Itās burning.
SHAWNA (PAIN) Yep.
RANI Same energy spread over a smaller area. Keep away from it.Any luck?
SHAWNA (GRUNTS) Iām not sure I can get in in time. Is there some other way?
RANI No.
SHAWNA Sure?
RANI Well. Thereās something else we could try.
SHAWNA What?
RANI Complete overload. We ā Iād overload the deviceās power core. [BEAT] But itād be forever.
SHAWNA What arenāt you telling me?
RANI Mr Smith is more than a computer. Heās a friend. My oldest friend. A Xylok is a living thing. And Iād have to kill him.SCENE 5.12 ā INT. HONOURāS WAREHOUSE
FX ā The Cobot continues to click together- the count goes up quietly in the background.
DRONES Drone 254 of 256 connected. Drone 255 of 256 connected. Drone 256 of 256 connectedā¦COBOT assembling. Wave integrity holding.
CLEO Whatās a Cobot?
HONOUR My drones have assembled to create a giant robotic killing machine. Obviously.
FX: Two giant robotic footsteps.
COBOT Cobot assembly complete.
HONOUR: Your little boyfriend stole the tech from Torchwood for me.Please Cleo, just tell me how to find the Doctor, or my 20-foot friend here will clear out the entire London Underground.
CLEO This is insane! Theyāve done nothing to do you! Itās theirhome.
HONOUR I have new tenants lined up. And theyāll pay twice the rent.Earth is an up-and-coming area.
CLEO Leave them alone.HONOUR You know what you have to do.
COBOT Cobot armed and ready.
CLEO Honour, I canāt get to the Doctor. If I could, I would.
HONOUR Then weāre done here.
FX she stands. Starts to walk out.
CLEO What? So what was the point of bringing me here, other than to show me your air fryer.
HONOUR Target practice. (SMILES) Move and my Cobot will execute you. Then, once youāre atoms, it will carry out its instructions and clear the London Underground.
CLEO Thatās cold and I have a date to get to.
HONOUR (SMILES) You really think heāll show up? Do you want to know where Apex is right now? Heās getting me my TARDIS.
CLEO No. You are so wrong about him.
HONOUR Am I? Nice talking, Cleo.
FX And she walks out and the door slams. The Cobot hums sinisterly.SCENE 5.13 ā INT. BANNERMAN ATTIC ā NIGHT
FX Energy crackles sinisterly.
SHAWNA What? You canāt kill him if heās a friend.
RANI I have to. Mr Smith controls all the security measures. I donāt want to do this, but we are running out of time. The fieldās getting smaller and smallerā¦
SHAWNA How long would the overload take?
RANI 60 seconds, maybe?
SHAWNA OK. Give me two minutes.
FX hacker speed typing!
RANI What are you hoping to find?
SHAWNA Every system has a hard reboot, a CTRL+ALT+DELETE, I just need to find out how to do it.
RANI How do you understand any of this?
SHAWNA You said he was alive? I think heās designed himself for human users. Iā¦kinda get it.
RANI That makes sense heās a good egg. Mostly, a very good egg. SHAWNA I can do this.
FX energy field is getting louder and closer
RANI Shawnaā¦Shawna! (PAIN) The forcefield. Donāt let it touch you ā I think itās lethal now!
SHAWNA Okay. Okay. I can find the reboot on the systemā¦
RANI (PANICKING) Itās getting faster!
FX energy field increasing still, very loud
SHAWNA Itās here! Itās here! There was a reboot, years ago. I canreactivate it!
RANI (PAIN) Shawna, thereās no time.
SHAWNA Wait...
RANI Shawna!
FX And the energy field roars!SCENE 5.14 ā INT. HONOURāS WAREHOUSE
FX The cobot beeps at Cleo.
CLEO Just so you know Iāve got a date in 20 minutes.
FX The cobot bleeps faster.
COBOT Do not move.
CLEO Chill. Iām just gonna sit here, minding my own business, and drink my peppermint tea.
FX Cleo sips tea.
CLEO (SIPS) Iām up against a bit of a deadline here. Youāre held together with magnets, yeah?
COBOT A wave integrity field.
CLEO Nice.
FX Cleo takes magic flute from her pocket
CLEO Hey do you know what this is? Apex gave it to me. Itās a magic flute.
COBOT Correction. It is a wave disruptor.CLEO Whatever. Itās got a lot of buttons and sort of works on rats.As I said. Iām on a deadline, so Iām just going to ā
FX Cleo activates magic flute ā frantic pulse. Cobot takes the hit
DRONES WILDTRACK Field integrity collapsing. Drone 256 of 256 disconnectedā¦Drone 2 of 256 Disconnected. Drone 134 of 256 disconnected.Cobot disassembling!
FX With a burble of Drones, the Cobot lands in a heap on the floor.
CLEO Push all the buttons at once. [BEAT] Itās almost 6 oāclock. I gotta find Apex.
FX Cleo yanks the door opens and runs for it.SCENE 5.15 ā INT. BANNERMAN ROAD.
FX The forcefield reaches fever pitch.
RANI Shawna! Quick!
SHAWNA Andā¦reset!
FX The forcefield dissipates.
SHAWNA Oh wow. It worked. That actually worked!
RANI You did it!
FX: Abby races over.
ABBY Shawna!
SHAWNA Abby!
FX: They hug.
ABBY Donāt you EVER put your hand in another force field again. I swear to God.
RANI Iām so sorry. This honestly wasnāt meant to be so dramatic.You said someone was stealing alien artefacts? The reason I was in New York was because of my friend Luke - thereās been a raid there. The world is being cleaned out of alien technology. And now theyāve come for Mr Smith. This is personal.
ABBY We know who the thief is. But we donāt know what he wants.
RANI Shall we get on that? I think Mr Smithās rebooted.
SHAWNA Should be safe.
RANI OK. Here goes. Stand back. [BEAT] Mr Smith, I need you.
FX Mr Smith fanfare plays, as he unpacks from the fireplace
ABBY
Thereās a computer-
SHAWNA In the wall, yeah.
MR SMITH Hello, Rani. How are you?
RANI Iāve never been so glad to hear your voice.
ABBY Whooaaa.
RANI Mr Smith, this is ā
MR SMITH Abigail MacPhail and Shawna Thompson. Hosts of the Blue Box Files. Sarah, Sarah Jane programmed me to track any discourse pertaining to the TARDIS or the Doctor.
SHAWNA What? The Doctor! Cleo was right -ABBY This isā¦incredible.
SHAWNA Yeah I canāt believe you were going to destroy this.
MR SMITH Excuse me?
RANI Nothing! [BEAT] What happened here, Mr Smith?
MR SMITH An intruder tried to access my database. They were looking for the whereabouts of the Doctor.
FX Blip! Footage plays ā Mr Smith being wrenched apart
APEX (ANNOYED) Come on! Iāve got to find the Doctor. I have to!Just give me his location, you piece of ā
FX Blip
SHAWNA Apex. We were right about him.
ABBY Poor Cleo.
RANI Did he find anything?
MR SMITH They did not find out where the Doctor is because I do not know where the Doctor is.
RANI You donāt know?
MR SMITH The Doctor is missing. Something is amiss with their timeline.
RANI Thatās not good.
ABBY What does this mean?RANI The Doctor canāt be missing, at least, not to Mr Smith.Somethingās gone really wrong. (BEAT) Mr Smith, prepare tosend out a distress call on all available channels.
MR SMITH Broadcasting on all intergalactic frequencies.
RANI Attention to anyone out there who can help: The Doctor is missing, I repeat, the Doctor is missing.SCENE 5.16 ā INT. CLEOāS FLAT ā NIGHT
FX Cleo entering flat front door.
CLEO (out of breath) Okay, only seven minutes late. He better have waited.
FX puts jacket down
CLEO Apex? You here? Iām here, Iām so sorry Iām late! Youāll never guess where Iāve beenā¦Apex?
FX opens bedroom door.
CLEO Apex?
FX A small box projects a hologram of Apex.
CLEO What?
APEX (RECORDED) Hi Cleo, just leaving you a quick hologram. I had a really great time last night. You know that, right? But I canāt fix this. Iāve got no-one left to turn to for help. I got in way over my head this timeā¦so Iā¦Iām sorry. This is really terrible timing because yesterdayā¦last nightā¦it was one ofā¦it was amazing. [PAUSE] The Doctorās not coming. I canāt save London Underground and I donāt wanna put you in danger. Itās better for everyone if I just go. Maybeā¦maybe Honour will come after me, not you guys.
CLEO You canātā¦APEX [RECORDING] Maybe when this blows over we can reconnect. Until then, I..umā¦see ya Cleo.
FX hologram powers down
CLEO No wayā¦he canāt do this to me.
FX she picks up the box, throws it against the wall
CLEO Iām such an idiot. You idiot! [BEAT] I canāt believe Iā¦[BEAT] Nope. Not this time.
FX: She opens her phone. Records a voice note.
CLEO [RECORDING] This is Cleo Proctor from the Blue Box Files, recording what might be my final entry. Abs, Shawna (BEAT) Iām going to London Underground. Honour is going to clear out the refugees and they have no idea whatās coming.Someoneās got to help them.Thereās no Apex, thereās no Doctor, and I donāt know where you guys are. Iām the only one left. Iām on my own. I did it before and I can do it again. [BEAT] Oh, and Apex, if you ever hear this, get some therapy, you absolute manchild.SCENE 5.17 ā INT. THE LONDON UNDERGROUND ā NIGHT
FX Same effect from Episode 3 ā the light tunnel into London Underground. She hops off with a yelp.
CLEO OK, that wasnāt so bad. (echoey) Hello?! Is anyone down there?
FX She runs down the echoey tunnels.
CLEO [QUIET] Where the hell is everyone? Last time it was jumpinā jumpinā down here. Hello?
FX Distance footfall. Heavy.
CLEO Hello? Listen ā if youāre hiding, we need to run. Honour is coming. And sheās bringingā¦
FX The footfalls get heavier and heavier. A march.
CLEO Sheās bringing a really, really big robot called..
COBOT Cobot detecting life form.
CLEO You again?
COBOT Cobot armed and ready.
FX Cleo pulls out magic flute as the Cobot advances.
CLEO (BRAVE) Iām armed. Remember what happened last time? Iām Cleo Proctor and Iām going to stop you.
FX The footsteps get really, really heavy. Stops.
COBOT
Wave disruptor bypassed. You have no other weapons.
CLEO No.
FX The Cobot regards her. Sinister operational hum.
COBOT
Step aside or you will be eliminated.
CLEO Just leave them alone.
COBOT Step aside human female.
CLEO No, Iām not letting you into that camp.
COBOT Step aside. Final warning.
CLEO They arenāt hurting anyone. (BEAT) Honour? Honour, can you hear me? Just leave them alone!
COBOT Obstructions will be destroyed.
FX The cobot grabs Cleo, who screams.
CLEO No! Let go!
COBOT Fatal force permitted.
Cleo screams in pain.
The music builds into a gleefully Whovian, alien symphony of synths and electric keyboard that cuts off into piano that continues under the rest of the credits.
END CREDITS Doctor Who: Redacted. Episode Five. Reboot by Ken Cheng. Starring Charlie Craggs as Cleo Proctor, Lois Chimimba Abby Mcphail, Holly Quin-Ankrah Shawna Thompson, Freddy Carter Apex Costa, Dervla Kirwan Honour Bray, Anji Mohindra Rani Chandra, Alexander Armstrong Mr Smith and Wilf Scolding as drone. Directed by Bethany Weimers, Producer James Goss, Sound design by Thea Cochrane, Original Composition by David Devereux. A BBC Studios Production for BBC Sounds.
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Doctor Who: Redacted
The return of the audio drama series, set in the worlds of Doctor Who.
